Child is like a soft clay, lil being personality is molded through the treatment of his/her parents!!
I have always been interested in child psychology because i believe that we need to understand every child individually in order to build their personality and thus their future.
Yes future!! Because their personality will determine their future...not only worldly but of the world hereafter (either jannah or jahannum)!!
It all depends on ''TARBIYAH'' did by their parents!! Mostly parents think that they have done their job by giving birth to them, educating them with worldly knowledge or some religious too and finally tie their knot with someone who is established, well educated!!
This is not the end of the story that began once years ago..
I have heard somewhere a question that ''When person should decide that what sort of children he/she want in terms of their development or character?''
We would all think when the couple will conceive...isn't!! :)
No but way before marriage ...one should seek for righteous spouse in order to have righteous children so that they may have brighter future, proper upbringing in the light of Quran and Hadeeth!!
Every parent is responsible for the blessing Allah has given him/her!
In an hadeeth,
Abdullah bin Umar reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. The leader of people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects. A man is the guardian of his family and he is responsible for them. A woman is the guardian of her husband’s home and his children and she is responsible for them. The servant of a man is a guardian of the property of his master and he is responsible for it. Surely, every one of you is a shepherd and responsible for his flock.”
Source: Sahih Bukhari 6719, Sahih Muslim 1829
One should not take it lightly but should deal with them tactfully by following the examples of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) and to have a clear vision that what sort of children we need to brought up?
What would be the ultimate goal ''JANNAH or JAHANNUM''?
U must b thinking that i am exaggerating..who will set jahannum as a goal for his/her child?
Every parent will always protect his/her child from over exposure of such hazardous stuff as fire, electricity etc. because it could be harmful, dangerous or risky!
So why we don't realize that by giving exposure of haram stuff like music, filthy and inappropriate media, backbiting, indecent dressing.. we are leading them to JAHANNUM!!
Strange isn't! Despite of providing everything to them whole life ..we lead them to burn in fire!
How and what we will be answerable to Allah SWT and to our children that what we have done to them on the day of judgement!!
We need to ponder over it!
So what little steps we can take in order to have righteous children from the beginning:
- RECITE to them Quran from the very beginning. During pregnancy, a baby can hear u when lil being is in her mother wombs. Soothe her ears after birth while feeding or sleeping!!When he/she grows up recite and learn together. Play recitation of a child so that they can relate themselves. It will motivate them. One of the recitation which i like for my child is by "Maryam Masood Laam"- an eight year old girl!
- Teach you toddler to make DUA. Daily recite aloud dua's of different actions (waking up in the morning,sleeping,entering or exiting toilet, changing clothes etc).Appreciate them to say aameen!!
- Instead of showing non islamic content in the name of cartoons...SHOW them Islamic version..Alhamdulillah we have them easily from various resources!! Such as ZAKY AND FRIENDS, ADAMS WORLD, MISHRY BUNCH etc.. U can buy them or download free episodes from YouTube! But time limit is important!
- BOOKS!! Of course wonderful source of knowledge..Appreciate them to read Islamic children books..Alhamduliilah Darussalam and Dawah book stores and many other are rich with such books!!
- KEEP AN EYE on children that what sort of activities they are involved in. Avoid exposure of gadgets in early age or afterwards gave them under your supervision! Specially be very alert about what sort of friends they have!!
- Weather your children are going school or are home schooled, make sure that they are LEARNING about their DEEN, and make them PRACTICE in their daily life.Be their role model by practicing yourself!! Work on their foundation!!
- Last but not the least, make your FAMILY LIFESTYLE healthy, energetic, organize, Islamic and loving!! So that your children may have comfort in his/her home with parents, siblings and relatives! First school for a child is his/her home, where they learn from the surrounding people!! Appreciate them to have good ties with their grand parents, siblings, relatives, neighbors and of course with their parents!! Again be their role model!
Hold tight the rope Allah SWT and do whatever best u can for your children!! And trust Him , He will never let u down. Appreciate yourself and your children for every little deed that has been done to attain Allah's pleasure! Be determined and persistent!!
Children are also like shadows, they follow your lead, you are living example for them.
Whatever future you wants for your children,
FEEL, BE AND LIVE THAT!!
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